Fears

I went to another Hearts 4 Home study last night and the topic was on our fears. There were no notes passed out. Instead, the discussion was taken out from the book of Job.

The class started off with us listing out our worse fears:
- DearHubby is often sick and I fear him dying at a young age
- Turning my back for a second then turning around and seeing DearDaughter badly injured, missing, or dead
- Losing another baby through a miscarriage
- Being spontaneously asked to lead a Bible study

The facilitator then recalled a study she did on Job and how the study categorized our fears into 3 levels:
- So What? troubles: small, trivial, everyday troubles
- So How? troubles: difficult trials with options (ie unemployment, minor health problems, financial achievements...)
- So Who? troubles: no option or way out, reaching the end of self, asking "who is going to get me through?"

The one comment that was made about Job that struck me was how God was the one who mentioned Job to Satan and even "challenged" Satan to make Job waver. It just really opened my eyes wider to the fact that God is truly in control of EVERYTHING because He KNOWS everything, the good circumstances and the bad circumstances. But what really mattered to God were not the outward things about Job, because all those things were stripped from him, but what really mattered to God was his heart attitude on the inside.

The next part of the class was a time to share.
Q1. Who has come to that So Who? point?
Q2. If all your worse fears happened all on one day, you would have no choice but to just truly depend and rely and trust in God. Therefore, how would you live your life differently today knowing that you can truly depend and rely and trust in God? How would your energies shift from trying to prevent your worse fears?

We all didn't have the opportunity to share. Off the top of my head, this is how I would have answered:
A1. The first 2 So Who? moments I can think of:
- The time I lost my first baby through a miscarriage. I felt so many ranges of emotions and the only direction I could target those emotions towards was God.
- The time DearHubby and I flew down to Texas for his double knee surgery and we took DearDaughter along and I was struggling with major back pains. The time was so physically demanding that I literally ran out of my own strength and God purposely allowed that to happen so that I could run to Him.
A2. The irony of Q2 is that I don't try to prevent my worse fears. This question made me realize that I am often blind-sighted by my So What? fears or troubles. I spend most of my energy just getting through each day and getting through each little battle. However, I guess the lesson is the same...Is everything we're doing out of the purpose of glorifying God or are we so blind-sighted by our troubles that we lose sight of our greater purpose? What does getting through the day with the mindset of glorifying God look like?

Created to Be His Help Meet

I went to another Hearts 4 Home study last night and the topic was on submission. There were no notes passed out. Instead, the discussion was taken out from Debi Pearl's book, Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious. It was a wonderful discussion as many of us were able to share some of our struggles with submission.

The main point of the discussion was how woman was created for man and not man for woman and the scriptures we looked up which supported this were:

Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man. (Genesis 2:22, NIV)

Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:22-33, NIV)

Lastly, since we are created for man, we ought to love our husbands like the church loves Christ:
1 Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth.
2 Worship the LORD with gladness;
come before him with joyful songs.

3 Know that the LORD is God.
It is he who made us, and we are his ;
we are his people, the sheep of his pasture.

4 Enter his gates with thanksgiving
and his courts with praise;
give thanks to him and praise his name.

5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever;
his faithfulness continues through all generations.
(Psalm 100, NIV)

Are we able to sing this praise to our husbands as we do to the Lord?

Releasing Our Expectations

I went to Hearts4Home tonight and it was once again another encouraing study.

Hearts4Home Notes for 4/25/07:

Do we trust in the Lord? Of course we do. We trust Him to provide us with food, water, shelter, and everlasting life in Heaven .... the basics. But what if His plan for us might mean giving up things that are dear to us? Our health, a relationship, our personal identity or agenda, our home, a career path?

Here is a familiar scripture that some of us may have even learned as a song in childhood. Let's hear it with fresh ears: Proverbs 3:5-6- Trust in the Lord with all of your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.

Are we in fact trusting the Lord with our WHOLE hearts or are there areas of your heart that you keep off-limits to Him? Are you afraid that if you placed those things in His hands He might change them or take them away? Which might be worse; losing those things to His will, or missing out on what He might have in store if you would forfeit your will?
- Examples from the group
.....- tithing
.....- career vs. staying home
.....- time

Do we lean on our OWN UNDERSTANDING? Do we acknowledge what He tells us in His Word, but then rationalize that it is not practical or current? Name some examples of our excuses that we might use to avoid obedience to His expectations for us. (Purely theoretically of course!!) Can you think of a time when your own understanding failed you?
- Examples from the group
.....- it's a different time, things are tougher for women now, some women even feel the expectation from their husbands to supplement with the income

Do we acknowledge Him in ALL OF OUR WAYS? This doesn't have to mean we have to have a fishy bumpersticker and where a crucifix around our necks, but are we known by our trust in the Lord and do our actions and attitudes reflect His divine special effects in our lives? What hinders us from being a living billboard for His love?
- Examples from the group
.....-depending on our own ability to do the good works rather than resting on His grace

What might a STRAIGHT PATH look like in your life? If you were to assume a "Hands-off' policy for your life whereby you committed to follow the Lord's leading in your life rather than your own, what might happen? Would you feel more or less secure?
(ran out of time, skimmed this question)

Review all of Proverbs 3 and list any requirements/expectations listed there for us, and their corresponding results if we follow His recommendations.

Where do we find wisdom, love, and faithfulness? Dust off that Bible and ask God some divine special effects this week.

-----
Copy of poem we read (did not catch the author of it):

Count it a JOY, Dear One
When life gets hard.
God is doing something HUGE!
He is also proving
That you are NOT a fake.

Be brave, Mighty Warrior.
Your God is with you!
When WAVES ARE CRASHING,
STAND to your feet.
Throw your head back
And FEEL the wind of the Spirit!

God is painting a MASTERPIECE
with multi-colored trials.
Go forth and display
Divine special effects
To the GREAT GLORY OF GOD

YOU CAN DO IT!

God's Providence

I went to Hearts4Home tonight and though it was difficult to concentrate as I was still feeling under the weather, tonight's discussion was very encouraging.

Hearts4Home Notes for 4/18/07:

Define "providence". This is a great old-fashioned word that has fallen out of style. It has been used to refer to the Lord's material provision for those who follow Him, as well as His reliability in preparing our way and orchestrating the events of our lives.

Read through each of the following scriptures and talk through how the principles in them relate to God's providence in the life of a mother:

Isaiah 26:3-4 You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, THE LORD, is the rock eternal.

To whom does the Lord give perfect peace?
Why does He give that peace?
How often/how long are we to trust Him?
Does your trust in Him ever wane according to your circumstances or energy level?
Why do you think He repeats His name in the last part of the verse?

Philippians 4:6&7 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your request be made known to God. And the peace of God which pas passes all understanding will guard your hearts and mind through Christ Jesus.

Are there any exceptions to His prohibition to worry?
Is there ever any true benefit to our worrying?
Have you ever known someone who seems to be happiest when they have something to worry about? Is that person's worrying nature a help to those they love?
Thought: Sometimes worrying gives us a false sense of control in that we think it will remove that dreaded element of surprise should something "bad" happen.

2 Corinthians 4:18 So fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen. For what is unseen is eternal.

Psalm 18:30 As for God His way is perfect: the word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in Him.

Psalm 85:12
The Lord will indeed give what is good...

Nahum 1:7 The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in Him.

Do you think that perhaps our idea of what is good for us is different from the Lord's?

Do any of these verses promise us that we will be comfortable or happy? Have you ever required your child to do something uncomfortable or painful that you knew was in their best interest in the long term?

If time allows, share experiences in which you clearly saw the hand of the Lord's Providence at work in your life. Who or what did He use to make that provision?

Mental homework:

In what areas have you neglected to make your requests known to God as described in Philippians 4:6&7? Have you been bathing anything in worry rather than turning it over to Him? Lighten your load and do so this week!

-----excerpt from DearLeader's letter-----
Hey You Darlin' Things -
You girls really gave me a shot in the arm to do all that I can to build up the Hearts4Home ministry and try to build up fellow moms who are the hearts of so many homes. I get goosebumps when I imagine all that the Lord might do through humble mommies who freely admit their weaknesses and turn themselves toward the very Word of God for a sense of direction. Can we doubt that our prayers will reach His ears and stir His heart? And when the Lord's heart is stirred to your favor .... well there's no telling what glory might splash out all over everyone around you! I hope you'll bear with me through this absence, because I can't wait to be back with you next week and share in what He's walking you through.

2- Get down on your bathmat! Yes, your bathmat! Okay, maybe you don't have a bathmat, but a thick towel will do just as well I suppose. A number of us referred to having "meltdowns" in the recent past and I have found that when I consistently carve out a few minutes to lock myself in the bathroom and put my knees to the bathmat and start talking to the Lord about WHATEVER, it relieves some of that internal pressure that builds up when I try to go it alone. So this week, try to chat with Him a little bit each day about what is bugging you. HINT: Turning on the shower during bathmat prayer time can dull the sound of family members pounding on the door.

3- Be a blessing fairy! Try to think of something special that only you can do for each member of your family, (especially your man) that shows them you love them. Extra credit for surprises, of course. It doesn't have to be anything monumental; a note sent through the mail, straighten up their sock drawer and leave a treat there for them to find, take a picture of your child's toes and tell them how cute they are, or one of my favorites: a pint of Ben and Jerry's Chubby Hubby ice cream after the kids are in bed! (always good for a laugh!) Have fun with your homework and we'll all report back next week!

I didn't participate much, but it was really encouraging listening to other's stories about God's work of providence in other women's lives.
- There was one woman who told us her funny dating story and how God worked things out, especially in her own heart, to give this man a "chance" and they ended up getting married.
- Or another woman who kept "ducking" her sister-in-law and the husband because they were Christians and didn't want to get witnessed to, but through God's providence all these Christians came into her life and she became saved.
- Or another woman who was having difficulty conceiving and was even given a call that she would never be able to conceive and then miraculously after surrendering her will she became pregnant.
- Or another woman whose sister's husband was called for a second deployment to Iraq when his departure date from the army was so near, but through prayer and perseverance his deployment date kept being pushed back until it was too close for his departure date that he was ultimately excused from going to Iraq.
- Or another woman's friend whose child's memorial service was God's way of bringing others to salvation.
- And many many more stories about God's glorious and wondrous work!!!

The Perfect Christian Woman

I went to the Hearts 4 Home gathering at church this evening. For this time, it is the small group ministry that I am being called to. The time alotted for this study is for 8 weeks, from April 11-May 30. This is perfect for me as I will need to stop all activities by June just to really prepare myself for the birth of our LittleOne2. It is also perfect because there is no book to be read. The ministry leader is doing a Bible study, looking at different facets of motherhood from a scriptural point of view. Therefore, I don't have to take even more time at home to read, as I needed to for last Semester's Study on Warren Wiersbe's Be Joyful book. This is also a perfect small group ministry as I get to network with other Mommies from church and share similar experiences with them and encourage each other through those hard times. Lastly, this is a perfect ministry to get involved in as it is only 1 hour each week. I get to be home before 9pm, much earlier than the 10:30ish time I used to get home from last semester's study.

Though I am one who normally likes the deeper study to challenge me spiritually, for this time in life, I am thankful that God has provided Hearts 4 Home.

Theme: Perfect Schmerfect!

Outline of Evening:

* About Hearts 4 Home

* Timeless needs of moms

* What if???

* The Martha factor

2 Corinthians 3:18 - And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

1 John 4:18 - There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

Hebrews 12:2 - Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

James 1:17 - Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

It was a lot of fun tonight! After our introductions the ministry leader took out a poster board and drew a woman figure on it. We were to just yell out what our perception of the perfect Christian woman looks like, both inwardly and outwardly. It was a lot of fun yelling out all those characteristics that you wish you had. It took the rest of the night to "draw" this woman and some of the descriptions yelled out were: patient, gentle, always a good friend, June Cleaver, Eve, always has a home ready for visitors, fit and in shape, always has sufficient time, never tired, etc...The question then was, how do we get this perception of a perfect woman and one of the answers were: We look at other women and pick and choose from them what we wish in ourselves and the compilation of these traits make up the perfect woman in our mind.

I guess next week we'll be looking more into Scripture about what is expected of us from God! I can't wait!