I've been gone from the blogging world for most of this week because I've discovered that it's when I sit down that my back just dies on me.
Tuesday was an especially rough day for me physically. As part of MyNewRoutine (which I need to post about), I have made Tuesdays my PaperWork Day. That's when I go through all the mail, pay bills, and review our budget. We've been using Microsoft's Money program to keep track of our budget since about 2003 and all of that information was slowing down the program to the point where I was waiting at least 2 minutes everytime I entered an expenditure. Therefore, on Tuesday I decided to overhaul the program. That took me all morning and a little into the afternoon. All these hours of just sitting did it in for my back and despite laying down and taking a shower to ease the pain, my back was gone for the rest of the day.
DearDaughter was very patient with me and entertained herself very well throughout the day. However, by the end of the day, because she didn't have much Mommy time, she was very fussy and clingy. In short, I lost my temper. DearHubby was home by now and I needed to start dinner. I noticed that DearDaughter had a poopy diaper and attempted to change her. Since I didn't have the opportunity to straighten up the house DearDaughter's toys were spread throughout the house with literally no room to walk nor room to put DearDaughter down anywhere for her diaper change (not even her changing table). The messy condition of the house, my sore back, and the fact that I needed to start dinner was just weighing on me already so it didn't help that DearDaughter just would not hold still for her diaper change. Since I was already in pain from my back, I had such a difficult time holding DearDaughter down and after 10 or 15 minutes of "fighting" with her, I just couldn't take it. DearHubby was in the bedroom doing his PT for his knees and I just yelled at the top of my lungs for him to come out and help me. Well, that scared DearDaughter stiff and my temper just caused tension between DearHubby and I.
At the end of the evening I told DearHubby how I just can't take all these demands anymore. I am just not physically or emotionally able to do everything by myself. I don't know if there was any resolution to Tuesday, but I am glad that a few months before this DearHubby and I talked about his priorities and what he "expected" of me, because I was able to point out, "Look these are the things that you told me were important for you. Though these are easy tasks, as you can see, I am still having a difficult time keeping up with them." I didn't say it in such a nice way, but I think I displayed to DearHubby just how much this pregnancy has had such an affect on me.
So, on to Wednesday. It was a much better day. I was able to get some things accomplished and in the afternoon I went to the Board of Health to drop off more paperwork for our new baby room addition and since I was on the road, I decided to go towards a Friendly's to pick up a free Iced Latte. I don't know if it had caffeine, but I thought, "I've been good through this whole pregnancy. 12 oz won't kill the baby." It was good and refreshing! Then, on the way home, I decided to stop by Target and I kind of went on a shopping spree. I have been feeling a little anxious about this new baby and I don't feel like I'm as prepared as I was with DearDaughter. Well, although I have a lot of Newborn clothes from DearDaughter, I bought Baby #2 her own going home outfit. Then, I bought a new Boppy slip cover because the one I have now is ripped. Then, I bought DearDaughter a little puppy backpack/harness (leash) so when I drop her off at Wee Walkers in church she'll have her own special bag to bring in that won't be mistaken for another's. Then, I bought DearDaughter a Mr. Potato Head set for her 18th month birthday. And lastly, I bought myself a cute little diaper bag. I didn't need it because the one I have now is still good, but this new bag is "stylish" and can pass off as a purse. Yeah, lots of stuff and afterwards I was wondering if I am an emotional shopper (I don't think I am) I did have a gift card with some money left on it, so it was like having a 20% discount on my items. Anyway, I had such a rough day on Tuesday and I just needed to get out of the house a little and it helped. When DearHubby arrived home, I was in a much more pleasant mood. The sad part is that I should be in a pleasant mood anyway despite what happened in the day.
Unfortunately, some time in the evening my back just died and I literally could not walk
Thursday was a good day, physically. I realized that it's sitting that just kills my back and I had a 7:30pm appointment so I knew my back had to make it until then. Usually my back is gone by 5pm and I get to resting in bed as soon as I am able. So, I spent 95% of the day on my feet, only sitting when I needed to hold DearDaughter or if I needed to give my legs a little break. The "strategy" worked though and I was able to leave the house still able to walk. My main goal for the day was to exercise, which I did get to first thing in the morning. I was also able to finish my Master Bedroom project (hooray for the 30 day challenge concept!!!). Lastly, I was able to get some laundry done. We had pizza for dinner and then I was off to my 7:30pm appointment.
So, I will leave this post right here...
In Pursuit of His Call