Home Life...Today We Celebrate 10 Years!!!

Things to remember about today:
- When we decided not to go to the beach house vacation in North Carolina, we also decided that DearHubby would not be going to his high school's best buddy's wedding this weekend for the same reason; lack of funds. However, today, as I was looking at our wedding pictures, DearHubby's buddy was in a lot of the pictures reminding me how dear a friend he was to DearHubby. So, for his anniversary present, I wanted to tell DearHubby to go to the wedding, but I knew that our financial situation still had not changed. I prayed about it and asked another friend to pray about it. Well, DearHubby's buddy called me and asked if he had paid for his room yet. I told him no because we were still undecided if he was really going down for the wedding or not. So, his buddy said, "Well, I just called to tell him that he can crash at my house after the wedding!" DearHubby doesn't have to pay for any lodging at all! So, that made our decision easy, I told him to go, as my present to him. He left around 11pm tonight.

- Our lender that we were trying to get the refinancing from called today and after talking to the supervisor of our loan processor, he said he would take the Denial off of our record and go back to their underwriters to see how we can work together to get our loan approved. I just hope they're not going to ask for the world. We still continue to pray that the underwriters will give us some guidelines that we can actually meet.

- Renewed our driver's licenses today.

- Ate at home. Grilled steaks with steamed brocolli and rice.

- Went to my chiropractic appointment.

- Took some family pictures to remind us of this day.

Home Life...Being Stewarts of Our Money

"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money." (Matthew 6:24)

While we were waiting for the results of our refinancing we were given a once in a lifetime opportunity to go on a beach house vacation in North Carolina. There are a group of people from our church who rented a beach house on the outer banks of North Carolina, but a few families will be leaving the house early. Since the house was already paid for, the rest of the group decided to extend a free room on the beach house to our family. All we needed to pay for was our transportation, food, and extra costs. Below is a letter DearHubby and I wrote to the group about our decision:

Hi Beach House Vacation Coordinators,

An opportunity to stay at a magnificent beach house for free comes only once in a lifetime and worth every penny to spend, especially when it would be with brothers and sisters in the Lord.

Unfortunately, due to our current financial situation, we do not even have that one penny to spend. We are quite torn about our decision as we so much wanted to join all the families for this once in a lifetime opportunity, but after much prayer and consideration, we will need to decline the offer. Although our lodging at this wonderful vacation spot would be free, the transportation, food, and extra costs would still be too much for our very modest budget.

One lesson we have learned from this experience is being better stewarts of our money and putting our hope and trust in God over silver or rubies. We were putting our hope on the refinancing of our home and spending money that we did not have and that was not ours. If we had been stewarts of our money, we would have still watched our spending despite our pending refinancing. We received word this week that our application was denied. Our false hope was crushed.

The beach house offer was our test. Do we take the offer because it is a once in a lifetime opportunity or do we decline it because we don't have the funds? What is the best decision? We are already in debt, something we have not been in for over 5 years now, so what's another few hundred dollars? Through much prayer and consideration, over and over again, the Lord has told us no. Both DearHubby and I are torn, sad, mad, frustrated, etc... over this, but we know we have to do God's will.

Thank you so much for extending this offer to us! Have a blessed time!

In Pursuit of His Call

Home Life...

Our lender received the appraisal report for our home and from it we were given 2 conditions to meet for the approval of our refinancing loan:
1. We need to tear down the buildings on the back of our property (old chicken coops).

2. We need to show proof that our addition passed the final inspection and meets all codes.

We received this notice on Thursday and I just broke down in tears. We have been trying to refinance since January and there has been one obstacle after another that has kept us from getting refinanced. It was quite frustrating as DearHubby and I think we are perfect candidates for a bank to give money to. Our credit score is higher than 750, which puts us in the Excellent category and our house is appraised much higher than what we needed for this loan. Either way one looks at it, the bank will get their money. If we keep the loan, then they can be assured that it will be paid monthly. If we can't keep the loan, for some reason, and we foreclose and the bank takes over our property, they would be able to sell our home for more than double what we're borrowing. So, it has been very disheartening to go through so many loop holes just to get this loan.

In response, we told the bank that we are able to show proof that our addition passed final inspection and meets all codes and that's what DearHubby worked on this weekend. He took Friday off to start work on all the final details of the addition (and even hallway); in other words, trim installation. We hope to get our final inspection done on Wednesday.

In response to the first condition, DearHubby told the bank that we will not be tearing down the buildings as they are valuable to us since they serve as storage areas for us now. The bank forwarded our response to their underwriters and we are now just waiting for our loan results, whether we have been approved or disapproved.

Although it's a very frustrating situation, we know that God is in control and whatever decision the underwriters make, we know it is God's will. Yet, we do pray for God's grace on our behalf and move the hearts of the underwriters to approve our loan. We were due to close on this loan on August 26th.

Home Life...

I was inspired by a Facebook friend to take pictures of my children daily. As a result, it's been precious because it has helped me cherish my girls all the more. These daily pictures are posted on their blog, Their Big World.

Last Wednesday I celebrated my 34th birthday. It was a hard day to get through because I struggled with a hardened heart all day. To make a long story short, things didn't go the way I wanted them to. I was looking forward to a quiet and low key celebration with my family, but instead it turned out to be a very stressful day. As a result of feeling so overwhelmed and stressed out, I responded many times out of impatience and anger.

As I struggled through the day and gave in to my fleshly responses of impatience and anger, I came across this verse that really struck and convicted my heart, "Do you not know that if you present yourselves to anyone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of obedience, which leads to righteousness?" (Romans 6:16, ESV). Through Jesus Christ, we have been set free from the bondage of sin and with His strength, we are now able to turn from sin and go towards righteousness. Yet, when I respond according to my sinful nature, I am presenting myself as an obedient slave to it, which I am not. I am a slave to righteousness through Christ and sin does not have dominion over me, so why do I act like it?

I am so thankful that God is a God of reconciliation and restoration and that I can seek for His forgiveness and also forgiveness from the ones I sinned against. Well, in the end, I still had a nice celebration dinner with some friends and we also went out for dessert afterwards.

Other than my hardened heart on my actual birthday, my DearHubby actually made my birthday really special. He's been working hard at work and at home lately and the girls and I have barely seen him. My only birthday wish was for us to spend some time together and that's what he gave me. He gave us time when he took us to the beach to look for Cape May Diamonds the Saturday before my birthday. Then, every day afterwards, until my birthday, he had a surprise for me. At the end of my birthday, he held his arms wide open and said he had one last surprise. He gave me the biggest hug and told me what a wonderful wife and mother I am and how much more he loves me now than when we first married. It was quite romantic.

This week, we're working on getting all of our refinancing paperwork in. We pray that we can be approved for a lowered interest rate to save ourselves some money.

Home Life...A Sigh of Relief

Every morning I can now wake up to a nice clean/picked up house and not worry about what toy I'm stepping on or what toy is missing and if the girls don't pick up their toys the night before, it's OK. Ahhhhhhhh...

Home Life...And the Wall Came Tumbling Down

We sent in an application to refinance our house last week and part of the process was an inspection of our house by an appraiser. We didn't think the process would go so quickly and DearHubby and DearFriend H did a quick finish on the addition last night and brought down the plastic wall.

The girls were surprised by all the room when they woke up this morning and after having them play in the addition all morning, I am now a firm believer of personal space! Things were stressful in our home while under construction because we all just didn't have enough personal space and we were all intruding into one another's personal space, "stepping on one another's toes." Now that there is enough room for the girls to play, they haven't been fighting as much today nor have they been getting into stuff they're not supposed to! Even DearDaughter3 could be put on the floor for floor time without being bothered by her sisters.

I also feel like I have a house back and a space where I can work!!! I am looking forward to starting an organizational project. We have bins and bins of stuff that is just being stored in our undone master bedroom. I would like to sort through them, purge unnecessary things out, and inventory and label each bin properly. I am excited that I now have room to do this!!!

We had some undone shelves in our hallway and DearHubby was worried that the incomplete shelf would be an eye sore for the appraiser. I took some time to dress the shelves up and was pleased with the end result.

That's a quick summary of our home life. I'm going to spend some time with DearDaughter1 today on some workbook work. Her preschool books came in yesterday and I'm excited to start them. However, I told myself that I would finish up those preparatory workbooks first, so we better get moving...

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Home Life and Faith...Am I treating my husband as I would treat Christ?

It's Friday but I wish it were Monday because it finally feels like things are getting back to "normal." The girls are finally starting to feel better from all their "malfunctioning bodily symptoms" and I was able to start my day with my weekly devotions. I don't know why when things are chaotic I want to just take things into my own hands rather than leave it in God's. When I did my devotions this morning, my soul was so renewed with strength and faith. Hmmmm...

Vacation was really nice and I thank God that He led DearHubby's decision to go to Illinois, where his family lives. There were a few situations that could have been an obstacle to taking a vacation and I'm thankful that DearHubby did not get side-tracked by those obstacles; one of those obstacles was me. I saw a lot of burdens on DearHubby's shoulders and I thought that if we stayed home for his vacation time, he would be able to lessen those burdens because he would have the time to address those burdens. Our vacation in Illinois didn't lessen those burdens, but it allowed DearHubby to just physically and mentally rest and come back home "refreshed."

What I enjoyed most on vacation was the refuge we found in my in-laws' home and the country Illinois "culture". DearHubby's brother and sister came by almost every day and it was fun just sitting around "like bums", as my sister in called it, fellowshipping and enjoying one another's company. Since DearHubby's brother and sister were around, so were their kids, and our girls had so much fun getting along with their cousins. It was also nice having the opportunity to plan a date night with DearHubby and not have to worry about who would babysit the girls because Papa and Nana were right there. Lastly, DearHubby has kept in touch with his high school friends throughout the years as well as made some new ones, and it was nice to just pick up the phone and say, "Hey, can we come over and hang out?" It was a simple vacation with no pressures and that's what made the time so refreshing.

While we were on vacation, DearHubby said that for the first time he wouldn't mind permanently returning back to Illinois because he realized the ministry we would be to his family. As we thought about missing family we prayed about our own ministry where God put us now. The same ministry we could be to his family (or mine) we could be to those around us where we are now. Therefore, in our prayer, we prayed for God to reveal to us how we are to be used. Not that we haven't been a ministry to others already, but to reveal to us a more long term ministry. One particular area we prayed for better direction in is how the Lord can help us use our home because we have invested so much time and money into it. If our home will not be opened up for ministry purposes, all that work would have been done in vain.

One ministry I have been working on is my ministry to my husband. I have been reading A Woman After God's Own Heart by Elizabeth George and one quote that has stuck to my head was a quote by Billy Graham's wife who said, "My husband is my career." What a convicting statement, especially as I have poured a lot of my energy towards my young children. I don't want to lose focus on my ministry towards my children, but I am realizing that how I minister to my husband is also a big ministry for my children to see as it would be teaching them how a husband and wife, the reflection of Christ and His bride, ought to relate to one another in the Lord.

I started off with something small, like buying ice cream for DearHubby. We get ice cream as a special dessert when we go out to eat, but a serving of ice cream at a restaurant or Ice Cream shop can cost as much as or more than a box of ice cream at the grocery store. So, I got DearHubby a box of Chocolate ice cream. That small act of buying the ice cream turned into me scooping DearHubby an ice cream cone, something I would normally have him do himself. It was a nice surprise for him that he appreciated greatly.

Our vacation in Illinois did not lighten up DearHubby's burdens here at home and as we pulled into our driveway he looked at the tall grass and said, "Whoa, it looks like my first priority this week will have to be mowing." When DearHubby is stressed with burdens like this, I am also stressed because we never get to see him. DearHubby just has more on his plate than there is time to take care of what's on his plate. It's an accumelation of little things, but when there's little time, little things become big things, and our family usually sacrifices time with DearHubby so that he can work. So, I offered to mow the lawn for him. As a result of me mowing the lawn for him, his time has been freed up to help out at the church this Saturday on a playground memorial. My whole motive behind mowing the lawn for DearHubby was to have more time with him, but it didn't work out that way and I was really disappointed. However, as we saw how his time was freed up to be a part of this playground ministry, we decided that God's reason for me mowing the lawn was just for that. In addition, when DearHubby saw how hard I was working to spend time with him, he stopped his work to give me time with him.

Another extra chore the girls and I did for DearHubby was clean our Ford Focus Wagon. It's the car that the girls and I use daily and DearHubby hardly uses it, but he has commented numerous times about how dirty the car is. DearHubby is the one who usually cleans our cars and so the girls and I took the time to wash the car so that there would be one less thing on DearHubby's To Do list.

The next practical advice from Mrs. George that I would like to implement is to respond to DearHubby positively. It's easy to do things for DearHubby because I can still do things grudgingly. It's harder to do things for DearHubby with a joyful and positive attitude.

We have had some issues with our health insurance's FSA account and the VISA card that comes along with that has been stopped for several weeks now. I gathered up all the paperwork for DearHubby to address the issue with our health insurance, but he just hasn't had time to address it. Last night he finally told me that he just does not have the time and that if I took care of it, that would be a huge help to him. I grew angry inside because the discrepancy is between DearHubby's allergist and the insurance company and DearHubby knows the situation much better than I do. I gave DearHubby such a hard time about it, trying to think of a good excuse of why he should address the issue over me. When he finally said that it would be a huge help to him, that's when I resigned my will and still grudgingly agreed to do it. This example shows how much work is still needed in my heart to respond to DearHubby with a joyful and positive attitude. Mrs. George asks this one question, "Am I treating my husband as I would treat Christ?" Convicting, isn't it?

So, that's our current Home Life and how the Lord's been working in our hearts. Praise God for His faithfulness :)

Home Life...

For the past (almost) 10 years, DearHubby and I have made it a point to go to bed at the same time. If he's needed to stay up, I stay up and wait for him and vice versa. Then, right before bedtime we read our daily Scripture reading and pray together and then it's off to sleep. Therefore, I am so thankful to DearHubby for allowing me to stay up past him, after our devotion time, these past couple of nights just to finish my house work. I've been having a difficult time getting back into the swing of things. Well, it was already hard maintaining a regular routine before vacation, and so when you're behind in extra tasks, it just makes it all the more a challenge to get back to a normal routine after vacation.

In addition, the 2 littlests ones have been under the weather. DearDaughter2 broke out with a skin rash yesterday all over her body and DearDaughter3 has had a fever all day long. I took them to the doctor today, another break in routine, to get them checked out. DearDaughter2 was given Benadryl and a steroid itch cream. I was told to monitor DearDaughter3. If her fever doesn't break with Tylenol by tomorrow then I am to return for a UTI test. I'm not looking forward to that as they would need to take the sample through a cathedar. So, I am praying that the fever breaks.

It was an eye opener to me when I didn't have 5 other people in the room with me to keep an eye on the girls. It's no wonder being on vacation was so much easier, I had 10 eyes on them when we were on vacation versus my only 2 here at home.

Well, I'm off to bed. I hope things will start to settle back to "normal" soon.

Home Life...eVites and Invites

It's 1:40am and I'm having trouble sleeping. When DearHubby came home from work today, one of the first things he said was, "I miss the slow pace of vacation in Illinois." He was right! Vacation is so nice because you can just get away from the hustle and bustle of things; you don't have to worry about anything except resting. I'm having trouble sleeping because I'm feeling anxious about getting back into the swing of things. I want vacation to last.

When I checked, we had 3 eVites in our Inbox and 1 invitation in our (snail) mailbox. We missed 1 of the events because we were on vacation. We are going to miss another event because it is for tomorrow and it is for couples only; a dinner and game night. It's too late for us to find a last minute babysitter. The 3rd eVite is for a ladies night out with no hubbies or kiddos at the beach for this Sunday. I don't know what to do, whether to accept or decline, because I am nursing. The last invitation is for a graduation party.

Then, there are 2 weddings we are invited to this summer. The first wedding we will need to decline because we are having DearDaughter2's 2nd birthday party on the same day. The second wedding is of DearHubby's good buddy from high school. It is on the weekend that we celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary.

Lastly, a very DearFriend from college just had her first baby on July 1st. He is being baptized this Sunday. They live 1,300 miles from us.

Of all the events, there are 3 that my heart is truly set on. The first is celebrating our 10th year anniversary the way we want to on our anniversary weekend. The second is celebrating DearDaughter2's 2nd birthday party. The third is driving 1,300 miles to see my very DearFriend's newborn be baptized.

So, it bothers me that there are conflicting events on each of those dates and we will need to decline some invitations. Most likely, we will plan a trip to South Carolina to attend DearHubby's buddy's wedding, so we will be celebrating our 10th anniversary at a wedding. We will definitely be celebrating DearDaughter2's birthday, but will be declining 2 other events for that day. Lastly, driving 1,300 miles or 21+ hours, right after a long trip seems unlikely, which leaves me open for the ladies night out, an event I'm not too excited about. DearHubby is encouraging me to go because I hardly go out on any sort of ladies' night out.

I'm not too excited about this ladies' night out because I hardly know any of the women and I would need to take DearDaughter3 with me since I am nursing. They are leaving straight after church and won't be back until after dinner. Even if I have milk in the freezer, that is a long span of time not to nurse; it would be about 20 hours. My sister went to a wedding once and didn't nurse for that span of time. Regardless of how often she put her baby to the breast afterwards, her milk production went down and she had to completely switch to formula. If I take DearDaughter3 with me I would be focusing much of my time tending to her needs and will have very little opportunity to get to know the ladies or have much fun. If I don't take DearDaughter3 with me I would risk my milk production and I don't want to do that.

Maybe I'm just old fashioned. Some times I am jealous that there are mommies and other parents who have many opportunities to take a break from their children to do things they like to do, but many times I feel like there's too many events requiring mommies or parents to be away from their children and there's great zeal from mommies or parents to be away from their children. It's a struggle enough to find contentment when each day is a challenge with 3 little ones. These events that say "no kids allowed" reinforces the idea that children are a burden instead of encouraging me to persevere in the work that God has called us to with our children and to find that call a joy and a privilege. My idea of a nice ladies' night out is spending time with a close friend, sharing our struggles as a mommy, commiserating, encouraging one another in Scripture to persevere, and all this over a nice cup of coffee or hot tea at a cafe.

A ladies' night at the beach with ladies I don't know doesn't sound too appealing to me, especially if I also bring DearDaughter3, but I don't know that I should decline the invite. Well, I'm afraid to decline because we've declined so many invites already and I don't want our inviters to think that we don't like them.

Anyway, I thought jotting down these thoughts that were bothering me would help me feel sleepy, but I don't. Hmmm...

Home Life...An Afternoon with the Duggars

We had the opportunity to meet and spend time with the Duggars today. We spent time talking, playing softball, eating dinner, and enjoying good fellowship with them.

In speaking with Mrs. Michelle Duggar about raising children in the Lord, she quoted Galatians 6:9, "Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up."

Thank you DearFriend V's for allowing us to share this time with your friends! You all are an encouragement to us!

Home Life...

I actually need some cheering today...

The Lord's been answering my prayers...For quite some time I've been discouraged about Motherhood because I just felt like all I was doing during the day was just struggling to get through it, fighting fires all day, rather than enjoying these little girls the Lord has blessed us with. As DearHubby and I read Lamentations 3 last night, the author said some words that I have thought, "He has filled me with bitterness,...my soul is bereft of peace; I have forgotten what happiness is; so I say, 'My endurance has perished; so has my hope from the LORD.'" Yeah, I was feeling like this about Motherhood. So, for some time now, every day, I have prayed that the Lord would show me how to enjoy and savor these little blessings.

Well, as Lamentations 3 goes on, the author says, "The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. 'The LORD is my portion,' says my soul, 'therefore I will hope in him.'"

Yeah, great is HIS faithfulness because He has answered my prayers about my little blessings! For the past several weeks I've been spending as much time here at home trying to find the best routine for us. This Monday, I finally sat down and wrote out a very detailed daily routine. I tested it out on Tuesday and tweeked it a little. I tested it out on Wednesday and Thursday and I have been enjoying and having so much fun with my girls! I have time to spend one on one time with them and I have time to get chores done. For once I can truly say that I ENJOY being a mom.

Well, today, I am just feeling a bit blue...I am tired...

Motherhood is such a permanent job and there is no day off...Today is just one of those day, where if I were at work, and had a lot of vacation time, I would take a vacation day to just rest...[Sigh]

Part of this new daily routine is planning out my day with the girls...Their morning and afternoon activities together, their morning and afternoon activities by themselves, their morning and afternoon activities with mommy together, and their morning and afternoon activities with mommy one on one. It's good that I planned for today, last night, because I would not have had the zeal to spend time with my girls and probably would have just depended on the TV to keep them entertained for most of the day. However, I've been so mechanical because I feel so drained...It doesn't help that it is raining out...

I keep wondering if this blah feeling has something to do with the UTI that I have also?

Last week I felt uncomfortable and went to the doctor for a urine test. It came out negative at the office, but they had it sent out. I knew I had an infection and had hoped they would just give me the antibiotics, but they didn't because of the negative test results. Well, finally, one week later, they called in and told me that the lab results showed I was negative for a UTI. I haven't had the opportunity to go out today to pick up my medicine, but I wonder what effects a UTI has on a body after 1 week of hanging around? [Sigh]

Anyway, I'm going to have some one on one time with DearDaughter1 and get a few chores taken care of before having to feed DearDaughter3 and get dinner started...DearHubby's been working on our addition and he has some help over tonight, which means having to put the girls to bed by myself, again...So tired...[Sigh]

Home Life...A Funny Story of Faith and Courage

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A few weeks ago, at the doctor's office, the nurse asked me where'd I get the names of my children, "Did you get them from a book?" DearHubby and I purposely named our children what we did because we wanted a way to open up an opportunity for us to share the gospel without being so forward. However, I never considered what I would say when I was really asked about their names. So when the nurse asked me where I got the names of my children I froze and gave her a very watered down answer.

The next day at our Women's study, I told my DearFriend D about my situation at the doctor's office. Later on, she called me with a revelation. "Your birth announcement has exactly what you need to say! You could start off by saying, 'My husband and I wanted a way to share our Christian faith and so we named our children these names to do that,' then you could just say what you wrote on your birth announcement!"

I thought, "Good point!"

Well, this past Friday, while we were at Chick-Fil-A for dinner, I had the opportunity to share the gospel with someone using my children's names. There was a family sitting next to us who had a newborn also. We asked the age of our newborns and found out that our babies were the same age. So, we got to exchanging the names of our babies. The husband then asked me, "Why did you name your daughter that?" As he asked this question, I grew really nervous, but I also worked up the courage to answer the question because I had practiced in my head what I would say; I would just repeat everything I wrote on the birth announcement. After I gave my whole spiel, the husband said, "Oh, I wondered if you knew what the meaning of your baby's name is because I'm a pastor." As he said this, a bit of disappointment ran through my mind...Here I was thinking that I worked up the courage to share the gospel with someone who didn't know it and all along I was sharing it with a pastor...

DearHubby and I joked about it in the car, on the way home. At first we joked and said it was "wasted" courage, but then we said that it was great practice. DearHubby also said that the pastor actually seemed encouraged by my sharing of the gospel; that there are brothers and sisters out there willing to set forth the gospel of Christ.

God is so good :) He allowed me the opportunity to share the gospel and the opportunity to work up the courage and tell of his story as practice...And as I shared this story with my DearFriend D she said, "Who knows, although you weren't directly sharing with someone who didn't know the gospel, who knows who could have heard you while you were sharing it?"

Home Life...

I wish I could say that I had a happy mother's day...Well, maybe before I continue on, perhaps I should take some time to thank God for all the good things that happened...

Thank you, Lord, that we made it to church on time to join in with the church family to praise and worship you!

Thank you, Lord, for the opportunity to talk to some people after church and to hear how you've been answering their prayers.

Thank you, Lord, for providing our family with an abundance of food!

Thank you, Lord, for a beautiful bright sunny day.

So, I shared Mother's Day with DearHubby's birthday and I decided that since Mother's Day wasn't a real holiday anyway we would do what DearHubby wanted to do for his birthday. DearHubby wanted to go back home and nap.

We had leftovers for lunch and afterwards we prepared the afternoon for a nap. Before DearHubby and I had children, our Sunday afternoon "tradition" was to nap during the afternoon in between the morning and evening services. However, since DearDaughter1 stopped her afternoon naps, I have not napped on Sunday afternoons.

Well, we have been struggling with DearDaughter1's disobedience in the evenings and we decided that it's because she's tired from the day that she has these horrible meltdowns. I wanted to work on "rest" time this week with DearDaughter1 and decided that we could start our first "rest" time this Mother's Day so that I could have a nap too. Both DearDaughter1 and DearDaughter2 are now sharing a room and we thought that if both girls were in there for "rest" time, neither one would really rest. DearDaughter2 still naps in her crib, so it was an obvious decision to move DearDaughter1 out of the room for this time. We set up her little couch in our room.

Every one was down for a nap by 3:30pm, even our new little one, and I was excited to finally get some sleep. As I prepared to lay down, DearDaughter1 said she couldn't sleep. I told her to get some books and to "read" and when she gets tired, then to lay the books aside and lay down. The books kept her busy for a short time, but as I was just about to fall asleep, DearDaughter1 tapped me on the arm and said that she still wasn't tired. I sent her back to her couch to lay down. Once again, as I was just about to fall asleep, DearDaughter1 tapped me on the arm and said that she still wasn't tired. This continued on until 5pm. By this time, DearHubby had 2 hours of uninterrupted naptime and so I woke him up and asked him if I could just have 30 minutes of uninterrupted time too. He took DearDaughter1 into the living room and turned on a video for her while he browsed the internet.

After my uninterrupted time was over, I got up and got a snack. DearDaughter1 asked if she could have a snack too. DearHubby reminded me that it was nearing dinner and that DearDaughter1 should not get a snack. I looked at the clock and noticed that we had about 45 minutes before our normal dinner time and asked DearHubby if she could have a little fruit snack to just hold her over. He agreed. When DearDaughter1 finished her snack, she wanted more, but DearHubby refused her more. DearDaughter1 didn't like DearHubby's answer and threw a fit. Her fit grew worse even after being disciplined and she was yelling and screaming and crying at the top of her lungs. Nothing DearHubby did would calm her and after much patience with DearDaughter1, DearHubby got angry.

The evening just wasn't the same afterwards. I reminded DearHubby that since DearDaughter1 is not yet in Christ that her tendency is to do what is wrong and that it is our responsibility to exemplify Christ-like responses. If we do not persevere in doing what is right and respond in an un-Christ-like manner, then that's the response we are going to get from our children.

Though I admitted to being more impatient and more sinful in my reaction towards my children, there was just tension between DearHubby and I the rest of the evening. Whatever dinner plans he had for the evening was squashed by this situation and I ended up making a frozen meal for dinner. After dinner, we put the girls to bed, DearHubby straightened out the house while I nursed our little one, and then we got ready for bed. Before going to sleep I asked DearHubby if there was anything on his mind and he said he was fine. I turned over and resisted the temptation to "talk" it out and that was the evening.

Before DearDaughter1 went to bed she asked DearHubby if he had a fun birthday party. He asked her what she meant. DearDaughter1 was excited for DearHubby's birthday party and asked me when were all his friends coming over. I told her that daddy's birthday party was our rest time and that our birthday gift to him was a nice nap. "Daddy, did you have a fun birthday party? Your nap time?"

I was thinking of making up for a sour day by buying a birthday cake for DearHubby today and preparing a small surprise family birthday party with the girls. I hope all goes well with the girls to do this...

Home Life...Adjusting

We went to Chick-Fil-A last night...I know, I know, we have food in the freezer from the abundance of food we received last week and we even have a whole cooked chicken and mashed potatoes in the refrigerator, so we had no excuse to spend money to eat out, but I'm beginning to get cabin fever and just needed to get out of the house.

Anyway, when I was pregnant and went out to eat, I usually sat on the outside to make it easier for me to get in and out. Last night, when I came back with our food, I noticed all the outside seats were taken and my family sat me on the inside, near the window. I was shocked to find out that I could actually squeeze through to the back without hitting anything, anybody, or myself. My big belly is gone!

A few nights after coming home from the hospital I sat down to relax with DearHubby to watch a missed episode of The Office, our favorite TV show, and I went to prop my arms on my belly and my arm rest was gone. Hmmmm :}

Yeah, although DearDaughter3 is now with us, everything has still been so surreal and I am still in disbelief that she is with us and that I am no longer pregnant. I still keep thinking of April 18th, her due date, and waiting for it to come. Everything has gone by so quickly, from the birthing experience to bringing her home, that it just doesn't seem real. DearHubby seems to think the same thing as he commented that he can't believe DearDaughter3 is actually a real person here with us. Yet, daily, we see my stomach shrinking and our Little One IS here.

Last week was a bit difficult being home with the girls alone. Though God has been very merciful to me by giving me an easier recovery from this C-section versus the recovery from my C-section with DearDaughter1, I was still in a bit of pain last week. My desire was to just concentrate on myself and DearDaughter3. I was glad when Thursday afternoon came along and DearHubby arrived home from work. Since DearHubby works in a Christian company he had Good Friday off and I was relieved for his short work week so that he could help me out. The most difficult part so far has been caring for my 2 older girls...DearDaughter3 sleeps a lot, but I am feeding her every 3 hours and giving her that undivided attention for at least 30 minutes and up to 45 minutes. It's during that time when the older girls want my attention and really act up by being disobedient or whiny.

Blessing...God has been very merciful as I have not taken any pain medications since Resurrection Day Sunday!

This is my first full week home with the girls alone. I've got a lot of things running through my mind like when will I get this done and when will I get that done and how will I meet her need or her need or her need?...Ahhh (sigh)...

So, how do you juggle 3 children? One child at a time.

How do you juggle 3 children and a house full of chores and in laws coming next week and parents coming the week after next?

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

I can do everything through him who gives me strength. (Philippians 4:4-7, 13)

Home Life...

Last night DearHubby and I attended an Open House for a school, Stratford Classical Christian Academy. They had such an encouraging and uplifting presentation about our God given role, responsibility, and privilege to train up our children in the ways of the Lord that the love for my children was once again renewed.

I have also started reading a book entitled Ina May's Guide to Child Birth by Ina May Gaskin. Ina May is a leading mid-wife and her book speaks about the miracle of natural childbirth. In the 2 chapters I have read so far I am being reminded of how wondrous God made our bodies to be able to present a new life into this world.

I have also made it a point, even when I'm tired, to once again start my day with God, while my children are still asleep. I was very diligent in spending time with our Father up until I started feeling overwhelmed about my pregnancy, about mid-February, and I was sporatic about that time, maybe only 1 day a week. I have decided, even when I'm tired, I am going to keep to my commitment to spend time with the one who loves me because He is always commited to spend time with me. Even when I don't go to Him, He is still here. And even if my motions may be mechanical, my desire is still to spend time with God and to learn His ways, and I trust and have confidence that God will bless those desires!

With the combination of a renewed love for my children, the awe of how God created the woman's body to endure child birth, and spending time with God daily, my outlook towards the arrival of Little One #3 is much brighter than it was at the beginning of the week. Last night I got as little sleep as I did on Monday, but I don't feel as overwhelmed and I actually feel more motivated to continue running this race!

It's amazing how God allowed a time of "darkness" so that I can see His wonderful "light"! I am so thankful for His faithfulness, always!

Well, I "cheated" on my healthy eating habits yesterday as I went to Dunkin Donuts for breakfast and then had pizza for dinner last night and a piece of browny for dessert. However, I think I needed a break and a cheat day, but I kept wondering if indulging myself was biblical. As I think about it though, the Bible talks about learning self-control and as I ate my Dunkin Donuts croissant sandwich and drank my coffee or had my pizza dinner or even my browny dessert, I didn't eat as a glutton would, without self-control.

Anyway, the healthy eating habits have been a benefit to my family. I needed to cut out sugars and processed foods out of my diet because the mid-wife I'm seeing thinks that will help keep the size of Little One #3 down, as she was measuring in the 97th percentile. So, I've upped the fiber and protein, upped the fruits and veggies, and pretty much cut out everything "white" like white rice, pasta, and bread and substituted them with "brown" rice, whole wheat pasta and bread! With these great food choices around the house, whether we're eating a snack or a meal, it's packed with good calories for the body. Even if I feel like I'm eating more, I've actually lost weight in my pregnancy :) That weight loss just goes to show how the food choices we were making were not necessarily the best for our bodies, even if we were practicing self-control (as my family are not big eaters).

"Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." Ephesians 6:4, NIV

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires." Galatians 5:22-24, NIV

Home Life...Dessert Social and a Movie

So we had a dessert social last night at the church and I signed up to bring a favorite dessert. When I signed up, I didn't see anyone list chocolate chip cookies and that's what I decided to bring. I thought I had all the ingredients at home and I didn't leave any room to go shopping if I needed to. All went well until I got to the butter part. I normally have a good butter stock in the fridge, but I guess I forgot to restock and I did not have any butter at all and the recipe called for 3/4 cups of butter. I did, however, have Country Crock spread and decided that I could use that for a substitute. They turned out to be the YUCKIEST tasting cookies I've ever made. I was so embarrassed to even bring them to the social. I wanted to just slip in and place the plate of cookies on the table without being noticed, but we walked in a little late and I had to walk past every one to get to the dessert table. So, as I made my way over to the table, people stuck their hands out to grab a cookie from the plate. There went my plan to be incognito as the baker of THOSE cookies. To my surprise, though, at the end of the night, the plate of cookies was empty. There must have been enough individuals to take 1 cookie because as DearHubby tasted them, he said, "I would not have gone back for seconds and I love chocolate chip cookies."

Well, the whole purpose for last night's gathering at the church was to watch the movie Fireproof. If you haven't seen the movie yet, I would highly recommend it! It's about a couple who is having marital problems and are on the verge of divorce. The husband was given a love dare by his own father to learn what unconditional love means in 40 days to save his marriage. This is an awesome movie for anyone as the message of the gospel is shared to the audience, the movie is clean with no swearing, no sex or sexual innuendos, and no violence. As I watched this movie, I thought that this is the kind of movie that should fill movie theatres. Everything about it is so positive and the gospel is preached. I cannot say enough about this movie, except..."Go see it!"

The church provided child care and so it was a nice date night for DearHubby and I. It was a nice evening.

Home Life...Getting Through the Worse and A Big Job Ahead

I have never been so sick in my life as I was yesterday.

Both my girls caught a stomach virus last week, which my friend and I think it was during our playdate at Chick-Fil-A. DearDaughter2 showed symptoms of it first last Thursday when she threw up while we were in the middle of my ultra-sound consult. As the doctor was in the middle of his sonagram review, DearDaughter2 just let it all out. Blessedly, she still had her coat on and made most of the mess on it, but it also got on her pants and all over the consult table and floor. I had an extra pair of DearDaughter1's undies and so I put DearDaughter2 in that just to keep her "warm". On the way home, DearDaughter2 threw up some more while in her car seat. I felt so bad for her because I didn't want to stop to clean her up and told her to just wait until we got home. I didn't think it would do any good to try to clean her up in the middle of the winter's cold. So, she bathed in her vomit for about 10 minutes. Poor girl. Well, after throwing up, DearDaughter2 was fine. No fever and no other bouts of throwing up. So, I thought that was the end of it.

Then, on Friday, DearDaughter1 was acting very different. At first I thought she was just being disobedient because she didn't want to go to the mall to get their update pictures done. Well, I finally realized she was sick when she said she felt like throwing up and we ran to the bathroom so that she could lean over the toilet to throw up. We waited for awhile, but nothing came out, so I grabbed a clean and empty garbage bag from the trash can and told DearDaughter1 to hold it up against her mouth until we got to the car. She didn't throw up at all that day. However, that evening she started burning up, temperature reaching 102 degrees (F). We gave her Tylenol and she was fine for the rest of the evening and even all day Saturday. Then, Saturday evening, DearDaughter1 started burning up again and even after giving her Tylenol her fever didn't go down, so we alternated Ibuprofen with the Tylenol for awhile. Then, in the middle of the night, DearDaughter1 finally threw up. On Sunday morning, DearDaughter1's fever got up to 104.8 degrees (F), but we still decided to wait it out before calling the doctor and taking her to the ER. We gave her several more doses of Ibuprofen and by Sunday evening, it seemed like DearDaughter1 had gotten over the worse of her illness. The fever was gone and she was back to her normal, talkative self.

Thinking everything was over and that we'd get back to a normal routine, I started to feel very nauseated when we went to bed on Sunday evening. I hardly slept at all as I could feel my stomach boiling inside. I started my bathroom trips around 3am. DearHubby got up for work on Monday at 6am and was about ready to leave when I asked him if he could hang out for a little while until I felt better. That little while turned out to be the whole day. Standing up just made me feel really nauseated and I could not get out of bed except for bathroom runs. I could never understand when DearHubby got sick how he could stay in bed all day until yesterday. No matter how much I tried to get up, I could barely stand it and needed to go back and lay down. In addition, since I could not eat anything, by the end of the day, I just felt worse because I was so weak from going to the bathroom 24 times. Well, my stomach was boiling up until this morning, but I was able to eat breakfast. I'm still a little weak from not eating at all yesterday, but I'm taking the eating easy today and not stuffing myself as I'm afraid I might upset my stomach again and throw everything up. However, I think the worse is over.

We're just waiting for DearHubby to come down with the virus next.

Well, as DearHubby stayed home yesterday, he worked on a computer project for a message board that he's a part of. He's posted some pictures on there and wanted to do some organization. When he went to his post he discovered that his pictures were not coming up. He mentioned it to me because we use the same image hosting service. It turns out that some people were abusing the hosting service and the pictures are not available for viewing. That almost made me cry as I host all my blog photos on there; I don't use blogger's photo upload. I am not diligent in keeping scrap books and so when DearDaughter1 was only a few months old I started a blog for my children just to jot down precious moments. Now, I am in a dilemma about what to do about these unavailable blog photos. It is going to be a big job to go back through 3 years of photos, find the right photos, download them on a new photo hosting service, and then put them back on the blog, and that's if I can even remember what picture I used. Do I start that arduous task or just forget about it and move on? For now, I am going to work backwards, starting from the most current photos and get as far as I can.

UPDATE ON THE BIG TASK:
After assessing the amount of pictures that need to be recovered, I have decided not to recover them. I have only recovered the pictures on the current Home page. It just showed me how unreliable the internet really is and if I want to really save those precious moments, then a hard copy scrapbook is still the best route to go. Therefore, I am glad I still have those stories I jotted down on my blog to help me remember those moments and rather than spending the time to recover those pictures back onto the internet, I have decided to put them in a scrapbook.

Home Life...Catching Up

I had quite a busy 1st half of the week.

Monday was an errand running day in preparation for Tuesday and Wednesday.

On Tuesday I had a playdate in the morning, a doctor's appointment for DearDaughter2 in the afternoon, and a Bible study in the evening. No time at home...

Yesterday I had a chiropractic appointment, a Bible study scheduled, and then a luncheon at my house. Blessedly, the Bible study was cancelled due to bad weather and that gave me more time to prepare for my luncheon, like being able to shovel a walkway to my door. My lunch guests started arriving around 11:45am and my last guest left at 5pm and I was beat. No complaints about it though because it was a joy to open up my home and provide a nice warm lunch for my church family guests.

Well, I am still feeling the effects of working so hard at the beginning of the week and so I've been taking it easy this morning, especially catching up with some correspondences here online. I'm even still in my PJ's.

I do have an ultrasound scheduled for 1pm, so I guess I need to get dressed soon, along with the girls.

I'm kind of glad for this low key day and that nothing was on the schedule except for the ultrasound. I'm tired and I need a day of rest.

Home Life...Keeping Joy in Trials

Since we've been home from California, DearHubby's company has been working him hard and with long hours, but the worse is over! DearHubby had been leaving for work by 4:30am and coming home at 7pm. Then, this Monday and Tuesday, he went in at 4am and didn't come home until 10:30pm on Monday and 9pm on Tuesday. Through all this, DearHubby was such a light and example of what persevering under stress looked like. He did not once get frustrated about the situation nor did he complain. It was quite an amazing example of depending on God's provided strength and I thank DearHubby for exemplifying such faith and self-control! Well, last night, DearHubby came home at his normal time and the girls were so glad to see Daddy as they hadn't seen him for 2 days.

As for me, my whole response to those long days without Daddy was not very good. I was just such a big grouch, again, not depending on the Lord.

As I witnessed DearHubby going through this stressful time, I was convicted of my own response to his long working hours and the one passage I've meditated on is James 1:2-6:
Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt...

And the question I've been asking myself is, "How do you keep joy under a trial?"

As I've meditated on this question, the one command that kept coming back to mind is to "Be holy because I am holy."

God IS a holy God and hates sin. He desires that all His children be holy and as James explains, these trials that God have set before us works to make us complete. Therefore, these trials, though hard, are working for our good to make us holy because He loves us!

God, then, also being a gracious God, has given us the Holy Spirit to empower us to always respond in righteousness. During those hard and struggling trials, there is a temptation to sin by responding in the flesh, getting impatient, angry, frustrated, and even sometimes doubting. So, it is comforting to know that "no temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." (1 Corinthians 10:13) When under a trial and tempted to respond in the flesh, God will always provide an "option" to do what is right in His eyes and we should never think that our only choice is to sin.

So how does this all relate to keeping joy under a trial? Joy is not necessarily just a feeling but it is something deeper. It is remembering that we are all sinful people and yet God made the ultimate sacrifice to wash away our sins. It is remembering that we don't deserve God's love and yet through Christ He loves us so much that He would continue His sanctifying work in us to make us more holy. It is thinking on all those things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy that is pleasing in God's sight. It is being thankful for all that God did and does for us and how His mercies are new every morning. And this is how joy is made real in our hearts, knowing that God is holy and wants us to be holy too, and as we think on that, our trials are made less burdensome because we desire to persevere in righteousness out of our love for God!

Home Life...

It's been almost a month since I've posted anything on this blog and it's hard to tell where to begin...

Our vacation in California turned out to be everything we didn't expect. On the plane ride there DearHubby excitedly said the one thing he looked forward to was the opportunity to ask my parents to watch the girls while we take some time to rest, maybe go out on a date, and have some time to nurture our own relationship. I agreed.

Our time in California turned out to be quite a stressful time, at least for me.

- My parents' home has been under renovation for the past 3 or 4 years and since the start of their renovations we have always stayed with my sister. However, my sister's in-laws were with them this year and my parents had to make room for us to stay with them. Though I am grateful for the hard work my parents put into clearing out the clutter from the renovation work, the house was still very dirty and not very child proof. In addition, because my parents have been empty nesters for several years now, there were no toys in the house and I asked my parents not to buy the girls any toys for Christmas because I didn't want to transport them home. Every day that we were at my parents' home it was a constant struggle watching over the girls to keep them out of things. I also spent about $60 in toys and activities just to keep them occupied (I am so glad for after Christmas sales as I was able to get all the toys on clearance from Target).

- My parents' vehicles were in poor condition and DearHubby spent the first half of our first week helping my dad fix the cars. We took a vacation in California in 2006 and most of that time there, DearHubby helped my dad install new flooring in their home. Since we were staying with my sister at that time, who lives an hour away from my parents, I hardly saw my DearHubby at all during that vacation. When I discovered that my dad needed help with the work on the cars, I got really frustrated because I wanted time with my DearHubby as I hardly have time with him here at home and I didn't want this vacation time to be just like it was in 2006.

- DearHubby got a tooth infection which caused him to be bedridden for a couple of days. DearHubby had to see a dentist and an endontist. He was given 2 anti-biotics and Vicodin for pain. He missed out on our New Year's Eve celebration and we even postponed our trip to southern California.

- With DearHubby helping my dad and being bedridden, I watched the girls like I normally do here at home. This frustrated me as I felt like we wasted our money flying out to California for doing what I do here at home.

- When we finally did go to Southern California, DearHubby and I offered to pay for things, but my mom insisted that we not pay for anything because she budgeted a certain amount of cash for the trip. At the end of the trip, my mom made a few comments towards me which expressed some resentment about how we spent their money, which made me feel indebted towards their "generous" giving.

- My mom didn't like the way we disciplined our children and approached me about it. When I tried to explain to her that we discipline our children according to the way we believe Scripture prescribes she made a comment that just made me cry afterwards because she made me feel like we were bad parents and that the method of discipline we are implementing is ineffective, "Your children are always disobedient!" The temptation there was for me to just slam my mom about her parenting, but I thank God for allowing me to keep my composure and respond to her with words from the Scripture and I encouraged her to find out what Scripture says about discipline.

- DearDaughter2 cried on the plane about 80% of the time to and from California.

Despite the list of stressful times there are lots to be thankful for and I think the thankful list trumps all the stressful times:

- My mom did give me a break from housework and I didn't have to worry about cooking and cleaning for 2 whole weeks. Since I had some "spare" time, I was able to get a good laundry routine going while in California which I took back with me. I do miss having food at the table waiting for us and I do miss not having to run to the grocery store.

- Although my parents have a lot of their old ways in them, they have also changed a lot because of their growing love for Jesus Christ. They are very involved in sharing the gospel with others and being a light for him. They are purposeful in much of their lifestyle to do things for His glory and that was very comforting!

- My parents did pay for most of our stay in California and we didn't have to spend money we didn't have.

- The weather and the sights in California were beautiful and by them we were reminded of God's wondrous power as our creator and His sovereignty!

- I love filipino food and there was an abundance of it!

- It was a joy to visit with my sister and her children again, to see my mom's sister and her family, and to see my dad's sister and parents (my grandparents) and even celebrate their 57th wedding anniversary with them!

- We went to Disneyland and the San Diego Zoo, and stayed in a beautiful resort for free, thanks to my parents!

- I had time to read the book I gave to my dad for Christmas, The Pursuit of Holiness by Jerry Bridges. Good book! I'm planning to get it for our family, some time.

- DearHubby and I did go out to see a movie, Yes Man starring Jim Carey.

- And the list can go on...

Since we've been back, I've been trying to get back into a normal routine.

One of the areas I've been working on, especially, has been paper clutter. One of my greatest weaknesses is keeping paper clutter and though I am an organized person, I still have paper clutter tucked away. One thing I usually do is keep paperwork before I address them, thinking I'd get back to them later, so that the paper clutter isn't in our living space. Well, the saying "out of sight, out of mind" then applies because when it does go out of my sight, then later never comes because I usually forget about what I kept and some things never get addressed. So, one of the things I've been working on since we've been home is addressing paperwork/mail, the day we receive it. I've been trying not to put anything away until it is addressed and since I don't like paper clutter in my sight, that's been motivation for me to address the paperwork.

However, I'm finding that keeping up with all that paperwork IS very time consuming and now I'm trying to work out how to streamline the process to make it less time consuming.

I've also been able to hit some sales at Target, The Children's Place, and Borders. I've gotten some good buys at 75% off!!! These CLEARANCE racks at the end of Christmas and the beginning of the year is GREAT!!!

I took my glucose tolerance test and had my 27th week OB appointment. There is a little bit of a concern that the baby is too big. My uterus measured 32 weeks when I am only 27. We're waiting for the glucose test results to see if I have gestational diabetes. If the baby has macrosomia, the doctors will encourage a C-section, and I'd prefer another VBAC.

The girls have also been sick and I seemed to have come down with a cold too, so we've just been taking it easy here at home.

Well, the girls are waiting on their lunch. I thought I'd just catch up a little.

In Pusuit Of His Call