It's 1:40am and I'm having trouble sleeping. When DearHubby came home from work today, one of the first things he said was, "I miss the slow pace of vacation in Illinois." He was right! Vacation is so nice because you can just get away from the hustle and bustle of things; you don't have to worry about anything except resting. I'm having trouble sleeping because I'm feeling anxious about getting back into the swing of things. I want vacation to last.
When I checked, we had 3 eVites in our Inbox and 1 invitation in our (snail) mailbox. We missed 1 of the events because we were on vacation. We are going to miss another event because it is for tomorrow and it is for couples only; a dinner and game night. It's too late for us to find a last minute babysitter. The 3rd eVite is for a ladies night out with no hubbies or kiddos at the beach for this Sunday. I don't know what to do, whether to accept or decline, because I am nursing. The last invitation is for a graduation party.
Then, there are 2 weddings we are invited to this summer. The first wedding we will need to decline because we are having DearDaughter2's 2nd birthday party on the same day. The second wedding is of DearHubby's good buddy from high school. It is on the weekend that we celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary.
Lastly, a very DearFriend from college just had her first baby on July 1st. He is being baptized this Sunday. They live 1,300 miles from us.
Of all the events, there are 3 that my heart is truly set on. The first is celebrating our 10th year anniversary the way we want to on our anniversary weekend. The second is celebrating DearDaughter2's 2nd birthday party. The third is driving 1,300 miles to see my very DearFriend's newborn be baptized.
So, it bothers me that there are conflicting events on each of those dates and we will need to decline some invitations. Most likely, we will plan a trip to South Carolina to attend DearHubby's buddy's wedding, so we will be celebrating our 10th anniversary at a wedding. We will definitely be celebrating DearDaughter2's birthday, but will be declining 2 other events for that day. Lastly, driving 1,300 miles or 21+ hours, right after a long trip seems unlikely, which leaves me open for the ladies night out, an event I'm not too excited about. DearHubby is encouraging me to go because I hardly go out on any sort of ladies' night out.
I'm not too excited about this ladies' night out because I hardly know any of the women and I would need to take DearDaughter3 with me since I am nursing. They are leaving straight after church and won't be back until after dinner. Even if I have milk in the freezer, that is a long span of time not to nurse; it would be about 20 hours. My sister went to a wedding once and didn't nurse for that span of time. Regardless of how often she put her baby to the breast afterwards, her milk production went down and she had to completely switch to formula. If I take DearDaughter3 with me I would be focusing much of my time tending to her needs and will have very little opportunity to get to know the ladies or have much fun. If I don't take DearDaughter3 with me I would risk my milk production and I don't want to do that.
Maybe I'm just old fashioned. Some times I am jealous that there are mommies and other parents who have many opportunities to take a break from their children to do things they like to do, but many times I feel like there's too many events requiring mommies or parents to be away from their children and there's great zeal from mommies or parents to be away from their children. It's a struggle enough to find contentment when each day is a challenge with 3 little ones. These events that say "no kids allowed" reinforces the idea that children are a burden instead of encouraging me to persevere in the work that God has called us to with our children and to find that call a joy and a privilege. My idea of a nice ladies' night out is spending time with a close friend, sharing our struggles as a mommy, commiserating, encouraging one another in Scripture to persevere, and all this over a nice cup of coffee or hot tea at a cafe.
A ladies' night at the beach with ladies I don't know doesn't sound too appealing to me, especially if I also bring DearDaughter3, but I don't know that I should decline the invite. Well, I'm afraid to decline because we've declined so many invites already and I don't want our inviters to think that we don't like them.
Anyway, I thought jotting down these thoughts that were bothering me would help me feel sleepy, but I don't. Hmmm...