DearDaughter1 has entered into that challenging toddler stage and unfortunately since DearDaughter2's birth, I have hardly paid any attention to DearDaughter1. I've been too busy trying to juggle caring for the girls and keeping the home and have neglected DearDaughter1's needs for Mommy time. So, for the past 11 weeks I basically let DearDaughter1 try to figure out her day on her own. When she got up in the morning I would give her a bag of cereal and a cup of milk and turn on the TV. When it was snack time, I would "throw" her a snack. When it was naptime I'd rush her routine so that I could get her down as quickly as possible so that I could have a little time of rest. Then, in the afternoons I'd run an errand so that I wouldn't have to deal with DearDaughter1 and I would again throw her a snack and maybe a book or toy while she was in the carseat. For me, I was having such a difficult time as it was just trying to keep up with 2 girls and even the necessary daily house chores that I didn't even want to think about dealing with DearDaughter1. Well, as each day passed, I would tell myself that I needed to change things so that I could spend more time with DearDaughter1.
What happened this Saturday finally opened my eyes to revisit MyRoutine and change my way of doing things, moreso change my way of doing things.
We ran out of cereal for breakfast and the only food I could think of that DearDaughter1 might like was pancakes. Pancakes are an anomoly at our home. I have not cooked breakfast, really, since DearDaughter1's been born. However, I thought I'd give it a try since the syrup you dip pancakes into is sweet. Well, the second I put a plate of pancake pieces in front of DearDaughter1, she refused to eat it. Since she had never seen pancakes before, they didn't look very appealing to eat. So, she pushed the plate away and our food battle began. I tried everything I could to get her to eat the pancakes, even bribed her with her favorite snack, Care Bears gummy fruit snacks, and she still refused. So, I refused to let her down from her chair until she tried a piece. DearDaughter1 sat in her chair for I don't know how many hours. It was nearing lunch time and I had not gotten much accomplished that morning. I tried giving a small piece of pancake one last time to DearDaughter1 and again she refused. I gave her a spanking on her hand and a time-out. I must admit that both were done in frustration and anger, which I have yet to seek forgiveness for. Well, after that food battle, I determined that I would not go through that again. Instead, I'll serve her the food and if she refuses the first time then I would tell her that she either eats or not.
So, this event led me to revisit MyRoutine. I discovered that by not spending good quality time with DearDaughter1, I was allowing her the opportunity to fall into her sinful nature, because I am not coaching and training her how to do what is good and right. I dreaded revisiting MyRoutine because I knew this meant making an extra effort to get chores done during the times I normally would spend doing things I like to do. I am discovering that being a mommy is truly a self-sacrifice. I got spoiled for a time with DearDaughter1 because though I had rough days, I was still able to make time for my self. I don't really have that time anymore. I struggle about that idea anyway, time for self...Hmmm, interesting topic for another day...
Well, I followed this new schedule yesterday and I was beat tired by the end of the day. I felt like I just worked and worked and worked all day long without a break to rest. So, I still have to tweak this routine just a bit to incorporate some time of rest.